Staff Comedy?

Here’s a -tiny- compilation of all the lulz that the staff get subjected to!
We will start off with a picture I took as I was lurking on the wiki. It’s not the funniest thing in the world, but we down in Staff Central thought it amusing simply because of the title and the fact it was totally in the wrong place.
image
Also, as you can see, no name or anything. Took us a bit of time but we quickly got it resolved.

Most of the laughs we get are generally due to the pointlessness of the help request, or the blatant lies which are visibly spotted. For example, consider the following messages we received though the help form:

im [name removed] and iiwant to become power user,(R: 0.596 U: 73.09 GB D: 122.65 GB),
i think i filled the requirement, so please consider this.

How do I make a torrent file and how do I upload it to the Box Torrent site?

ok down loading, not got problems there, but how do i seed, my email is [e-mail address removed] help me please

I am wondering what the “you are warned” triangle means. I know I don’t log on frequently, but I don’t recall making any issues here before. So, if someone could tell me what I did wrong so I can fix it for next time, I would appreciate it. Thank you.

Hey, I’ve been seeding for the past 2 days; all day long but because my upload speeds suck and they peek at like 10 kb/s my account has still been suspended.
Is there anyway of increasing my ul speed because I can’t possibly seed 30GB worth of animé with 10 kb/s speeds.
Thanks.

Hi
I recently reformated my PC so I dont have any torrent available to seed. However, Im kind of stuck now because in order to download again, I need to seed. What can I do to seed back again? Thank you!

>> Depressingly, all these questions were asked in the last 72 hours. Imagine how bad it is on a week to week basis. It hurts when we realise it’s all in the wiki. ;_; It breaks our delicate little hearts.

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